CIVILIZATION BASED ON FECES TRAVEL

I have a theory that you can judge a cultures level of civilization by how far human feces travels from it. Let me drop it to you like this:

In less civilized cultures, one defecates on the surface of the planet and leaves it. In slightly more civilized cultures one will bury it, thus increasing the distance between feces and human. Some cultures will both leave feces or bury it, but do so at a location distant from their homes. Even more civilized.

Water water everywhere but not a drop to drink.

Granted, it IS possible for uncivilized cultures to poop in a river and have it travel hundreds of miles on the Mississippi, Yangtze, Amazon, Nile or Danube. You would think this implies civilization. It does not. I must stipulate that the distance traveled by said feces must be facilitated by humans. Not nature. Pooping in a river is clever, but not civilized. (something the village down-river is bound to agree with)

That being said, some cultures have sewage systems that remove the feces from the home and channel it into a river. This is more civilized than just pooping directly in a river, but not the supreme measure of human civilization no matter how far away the waterway.

Now, I live in America in the year 2,011 AD and when I "go", I press a lever on a porcelain chair that sucks waste down a tube that passes under the floor, out of the house and under the front lawn to the street where it travels under traffic into a larger tube that takes it downhill, across town and toward larger and larger pipe systems that connect and connect and connect to sewage treatment plants that process and de-crapify it so that it can be disposed of properly.

Chart needed? Civilized.

Imagine the massive metropolis of New York, all the toilets in all the apartments, hotels, skyscrapers, on all the floors, depositing human waste down the spines of buildings then underground, gushing under the city as people walk blissfully above, channeled to massive pools at waste treatment facilities.

Truth is the system is so advanced I have no clear idea what they do or how they do it nor do I care. Everything is so worked out we don't NEED to know how the heck they do it. We pull a lever, push a button, or in some instances, a computer sensor does it for us, and we're back in business. No fuss no muss.

And our feces travels far. Kilometers. Miles. All engineered by man.

Signs of true civilization.

MJW